Friday, March 19, 2010

open mouth ... insert foot

last saturday was the Saturday Sampler 3 meeting at TQS ... i had to go alone on accounta Auntia's allergies kept her down and out for the count ... believe it or not i actually got myself out the door on time and into the shop with five minutes to spare ... there were plenty of seats to choose from and i plopped myself down in the front row on the end toward the door just in case i needed to make a quick getaway ... Peggy Money Penny always saves seats in the back row for her friends and she shouts to them as they walk in the door
i saved you a seat!

which is a nice thing to do i guess but it doesn't leave much of the back row for anybody else ... that's where the chairs with cushions are - which means that the rest of us have to warm up metal chairs with our bottoms ... anywho ... i had settled into my chair and the seat was finally warmed up when More Than A Gardener came in five minutes late with her little grandson ... she stood in front of me and said that she wanted to sit close to the door in case the little guy became rowdy during our meeting ... i was busy trying to make myself non-threatening cuz i don't think there's a much scarier sight than a bunch of women wielding rotary cutters early on a saturday morning - especially if you're just a little guy with More Than A Gardener for a grandmother and admiring the purple binder that the quilter sitting next to me had for her notes ... i think that More Than A Gardner must have gone on for a bit about needing to sit by the door ... but it didn't occur to me that she actually wanted me to move from what she must have perceived as prime real estate till she got exasperated and huffed over to the other side of the room ... in the meantime ... Peggy Money Penny shouted
where's your other half?
and it took me a minute to understand that she was talking to me about Auntia ... so i explained that Auntia was under the weather
you're always together!
well ... she is my daughter and we do live in the same house and we do both quilt
do you know how lucky you are?!?
ummmm ... yes ... i do
then we started talking about mothers and daughters and quilters and non-quilters and we discovered that both of our mothers think that quilting is odd ... and we talked about what would happen to our stashes and our UFOs and WIPs and PhDs when we're gone ... i said that Auntia always asks me
do i get this when you die?

and Peggy Money Penny said that her children already know what to do with her quilts - they go with her to the grave ... it was the longest conversation that i've had with Peggy Money Penny in the past two years ... her friends started to show up ... she turned her back to me and shouted
i saved you a seat!
and then the meeting started ... Sheri did her demonstration for this month's block ... More Than A Gardener let the little guy wander around and he came this close to smacking his head against the light box and other sharp objects five gazillion times and she said that his parents are in Florida for a week and he is running her ragged ... one of the other quilters had five of her grandchildren visiting for the month and entertained us with stories about red and green crayons on the counter and one of the kids telling his mother that Granny made a dog bed for him to sleep in - which was actually a human bed with 101 Dalmation sheets - and how much she loves having her little visitors and how glad she will be when the month is over ... and More
Than A Gardener said that she raised three boys and blah blah blah ...... and then it was time for show and tell ... Peggy Money Penny showed her quilt top from the first Saturday Sampler ... it was lovely ... autumn-colored batiks and an interesting setting that complemented the twelve blocks ... i said that it would be perfect in my living room
this is for my mother and you can't have it!

ha ha ha! do i get it when she dies?
keeping our earlier conversation in mind - it was kinda funny ... but Peggy Money Penny's friends hadn't been around for our earlier discussion and they gasped ... audibly
ummm ... gulp ... er ... ummmm ... sorry ... my bad
sometimes i wish i had the ability to highlight/delete the stupid things that come out of my mouth ... if Auntia had been there she would have been nudging me to shut up ... and then she would have sighed and said something like
mom!!! i can't take you anywhere!

or
hey!!! that's MY line!!!
sigh...

anywho ... i finished the paper-pieced BOMs and the SS3 BOM yesterday...i had to turn the picture over cuz the SS3 block was upside down
the blue and white blocks are Gentleman's Fancy and North Wind ... and now i'm gonna go get some corned beef and veggies and a piece of beer bread ... maybe if i keep my mouth filled with food i won't say anything stupid

5 comments:

Mama Spark said...

OMG you crack me up!! I want some f that beer bread! What no Irish soda bread??

Shannon said...

LMBO!

I'm paranoid half the time so I analyze every convo I attempt to have after the case. I especially like it when I see people's eyes glaze over after a spell. I imagine that happens on my blog, too. LOL

Annemiek said...

Did anyone actual LISTEN to whatever instructions??? I so wish I could attend those meetings along with you. Or..better not, I'm a rebel too and never learned to keep my mouth shut *lol*

Gran said...

I certainly like the continuing saga of the BOM Gang. You are a perfect ending to a perfect day. Happy Spring and thank you from the bottom of my heart for sharing your life experience nuts, bolts and all. (Puns all intended!)

Thelma said...

I just LOVE these class recaps!!
So no one in that class knows you have a blog?
I'm very impressed you got to class before it started.